If it's Wednesday it must be the washer leaking.

I spent last weekend in Indianapolis at my third NDSC convention and I'm only now coming off a high that's probably illegal in most states.  I love-love-love going to these, despite being a grumpy introvert, despite the money (though I wrangled grants this year!), and despite the emotional landmines I occasionally hit.  This year was no different.  I want to run thru some of the sessions on here but thought I should play a little catch up first.  

Yosemite!

We've had fun! exciting! events almost every weekend this summer - I went to Yosemite by way of a work trip, we attended Gigi's memorial in Nebraska and saw extended family (happily without the expected fireworks), the whole family played extras in a movie, we finally did the local Step Up for Down syndrome walk right (turns out mimosas are key), The Boy went on his first official Boy Scout camping trip and built a rocket, and we had some of my favorite weekend guests for July 4th (happily with fireworks!).

The Rocket

Each of these deserved its own post.  Sorry 'bout that.  It never happened because I've also been fighting the chronic, unwinnable battle of trying to get my **** done at work.  It's a 60+ hour/week job and I only have 40 hours to give it, which leaves me constantly frustrated.  And tired.  

Camping!

The frustration's compounded by the fact that something expensive is breaking around here every.single.fucking.week.  The best (but sadly not the least expensive) incident was when The Girl, who has taken to acting out her favorite videos with her dolls and iPad (adorable!), took the iPad into the tub (That she'd filled herself! Such initiative!) to reenact a certain Sofia the First Mermaid episode.  Turns out drying electronics in rice doesn't work.  At all.  The monitor on my computer then died in solidarity.  There were various other trips to the vet, optometrist, and thousands of dollars spent on the cars, only to lose first gear on one.   

I still can't run on my effing feet, so I tried to tackle the garden to blow off some steam, but we live with heavy clay... and the $%^&* tiller stopped working. You gotta laugh, right? 

The Schedule

Piling on, child care this summer has been patched together with scotch tape and old chewing gum.  My father in law has been a tremendous help with the gaps but I feel like we've over-imposed and my calendar of who's where watching which child looks like a NASA flight plan.  The Boy at least got to go to some YMCA camps but The Girl... did not.  Which is a whole 'nother series of laments I'll spare you.  Out of desperation we just signed her up for two weeks of hippotherapy camp, which I've always wanted to get her into and am a bit giddy over, but I'm going to be a kidney shorter by the time it's over. 

Step Up for Down syndrome!

I think I'm most frustrated with myself - all of this is just so much first world, (sinking) middle class bullshit.  I mean, hell, we had an iPad and cars to break, right?  I have a job I mostly enjoy.  Why can't I keep hold of the joy and let rest roll off?  How did I let a needy corporate America worm its way into my head?  

Both my kids are healthy and thrilled to be spending so much time with their Papa*.  Matt's cousin's new baby was just diagnosed with leukemia and they've started a six month stay in hospital.  They would chew off their own legs to be worried about car transmissions and summer camps right now.  

I don't really have a solution - this is just me wondering what the **** is wrong with my head.  Look at these pictures - it's like a magazine spread of Must Do Summer Fun (most of these photos are also the ones that ended up on FB - should we talk about people putting up a pretty front?).  Arghhh.  I miss running. 

 *I should clarify Papa Fritz is pictured here because we saw him in NE, he stayed with us for a week, & helped The Boy build his rocket.  I am horrified to discover I have no pictures of the kids and Papa Jim.  Sorry Papa Jim!!!

In Praise of the OtterBox

I have a real post in the works but this will do for tonight.  I couldn't decide whether to call this "Why we don't have nice things" or "Freakish Bit of Good Fortune" and combining them was too long so this will be instead be an ode to the OtterBox which my in laws also wisely purchased when they all chipped in and bought my daughter an iPad.  Six months ago.

I think their primary goal was its use as an AAC so they could communicate with her, but we're still working on that.  In the meantime we have found some other wonderful apps and I am absolutely delighted with how The Girl has taken to it.  So delighted, in fact, that on Sunday I was bringing it so she could show her grandparents the magic they had bestowed while I took The Boy to a birthday party.

Matt was getting ready for work, I was doing my usual frantic I can't believe we're going to be late AGAIN scramble, and I put it on the roof of the car while I wrangled children and gift bags.  I remember thinking that was not the best place for it.  And then I drove off through a monsoon-like rainstorm.

Spoiler alert:  It was, indeed, NOT the best place.

About 20 miles later it suddenly dawned on me what I had done.  I pulled off to the side of the road, fruitlessly checked the roof, and then swore up a blue streak.  I felt ill.  Actually physically ill.  We're very fortunate in a thousand ways, but replacing $600 iPads is sooo not in the budget.  And it had been  gifted barely 6 months earlier from my in laws (!).  AND it wasn't just a fun thing, it was for my daughter, the visual learner, and may even be her primary mode of communication someday.

I couldn't even talk about it.  I left The Boy in the car while I took his sister inside to her grandparents (whose eyes I tried very hard to avoid meeting) because he has never met a fact he hasn't shared and I just could not process my own guilt.  It was wholly my fault and it was such an asinine thing to do - my adrenaline is going again just writing about it.  I called Matt who drove as far as the onramp, but he didn't see it and said it wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes on the highway.  After the party was over,  I collected The Girl and we drove back up and down the highway but it was dark and still raining and we couldn't even find a debris field.

Then I drove up and down the highway a few more times over the next 48 hours.  Nothing.

But at 2pm today my phone (my free phone! why didn't I lose that?) buzzed and reminded me I had a DDS appointment.  Something had just exploded on my desk so I nearly canceled but I was a year overdue so opted for a little "me time" (at the dentist. whee.).  It was clear and dry out for the first time in weeks and... dammit if I didn't see something off on the shoulder of the road, a mere 2' from semis rumbling by at 70mph.

There were shenanigans circling back around (and around. and around) to collect it and I don't love y'all enough to have lingered for a picture of it on the ground next to the fast lane with said semis rumbling by but HOTSHITDAMN look what I found:

I got it home and hotshitdamn if it isn't FINE.  It's still charging and Matt thinks the touchscreen might be a little wonky but that would be repairable (maybe? yes?) with a few dry circuit boards or something.  Right?  I have no idea how they work but suspect iPads, magical as they are, weren't designed to sit in the rain for two days.  Nonetheless, I am positively GIDDY.  First, that thing stayed on the roof of my car in the middle of storm for over 17 miles.  Second?  It fell 5 1/2 feet at 73mph 61mph, landing on asphalt and the screen didn't even crack.  Yes, the OtterBox itself is mangled but it did its job valiantly and then some.  Fourth? What were the odds I'd find an 9x7x1/2" box along 20+ miles of highway?  MAGIC.

Note:  This is not a sponsored post.  This is a thank you note to the Otter people - Thank you for saving my pattootie, my girl's access to a bigger world, and preserving the peace and traquility of all future family functions.

Otters in the rain

Rescued Mommy from her shame

Sweet apple, uncrunched.

Car-ma

Let's see.... what was I saying?  Oh, that's right!  I wrote, "things have  actually been.... GOOD."

As my Gigi likes to say, "That'll learn ya."

We spent a fabulous day with friends on the 4th - started early with mimosas and a parade and finished with a Just Dance contest on the Wii.  No, I'm not talking about the kids.  There may have been some contraband video taken but this was done expressly against house rules and once caught I promised not to post.  You know you've found good friends when you can practice your scrunched up 80s pop star face singing into a ketchup bottle, and then dance to Abba (?!) and practice your moon walk without wanting to flee the state the next morning.  Wouldn't want to mess that up! 

But then around 4am, The Boy came into our room and started writhing around till he finally puked at 5. You know who employers LOVE?  People who call in sick after a holiday.  Matt & I had some hurried negotiations about who it was going to look worse for and I lost.  But it was fine!  I needed a quiet day to catch up - in 24 hours (of which 12 were spent elsewhere) we had somehow accumulated 4 loads of dirty dishes and there was mail and kid art piled up so high it was a firehazard. 

You think I'm joking about the dishes, don't you?

So Matt takes my car, because it gets much better gas mileage than his and doesn't reek of rancid french fries and moldy coffee.... he calls within 15 minutes to tell me it had blown up.  Started vibrating and ALL the warning lights came on.  In a fit of luck he was 2 miles from the dealership but they were busy & couldn't get to it till Friday.  I initially thought I'd get a post in on my bonus day at home, but I spent Thursday in a bleak, dark place and organized the pantry instead.  Because when a giant meteor is heading toward your financial world, it's best to have the pasta, rice, and couscous all lined up together on one shelf.

Turns out it wasn't the engine or transmission, which is what I'd spent the day sulking about - a new car is soooo not in the budget - but it was money we don't have, followed by MORE money yesterday to get Matt's car patched up, because in the two days my car was shopped he'd been pulled over twice for an expired registration.  Missouri has this ridiculous standard that vehicles be inspected & roadworthy (what?) and we were putting off the mortgage payment in work his car needed because this summer has been a constant stream of unexpected bills.  He is now the proud new owner of operational tires, brakes, rotors, and some muffler do-hickey - though despite all the money we forked over they did not fix the french fry smell.  Service these days! 

So mommy's been a little grumpy.  A mood not improved when The Girl got ahold of the syrup bottle yesterday (it was so much worse than you're imagining), when The Boy gave his friend a black eye with a tinker toy, or when I, in a pre-coffee fog, tried to make waffles with olive oil.  Not tasty, in case you're wondering.  But I hauled them off to the pool Sunday (The Girl finally went down the slide solo! Huge!), followed by a nap for everyone and we'll all carry on.  Tally-effin'-ho!

*My co-worker used car-ma in an email after I begged the office for a ride home Friday. This was followed by a series of emails citing: car-maggedon, car-pocalypse, pandCARic (pandemic?), and e-CAR-nomy. Awesome.

Ante Up

Or:  Our Inexorable Decline

For those of you playing along at home, and/or anyone who has money in the game, this is the score:

• 1 New Transmission (Matt's car)
• 2 Volvo Dealer visits (my car)
• 3 Hundred dollars spent, fruitlessly (my car)
• 4 Bloggers, who've quit, only after I finished reading all their archives. (Finnian's Journey just closed up shop. Technically she just moved, but the list doesn't work if we're being technical).
• 5 Durable goods, down.    

In addition to both cars breaking this winter, painfully chronicled here, here, and here (and also getting rear ended in October), the ginormous living room TV died just before New Years, and then the mini party-fridge, that gets passed around the family but technically we bought, also died, just after.  If I had to pick a new header right now, it would be a picture of me, photoshopped into a scene from the 2012 movie, holding up a sign saying We're Dooooommmmmeeedddd.....!

But, since we're still pretending things will be OK, the 2nd dealer visit (yesterday) resulted in only a $30 charge ....+ the $25 in gas Matt put in the loaner, only to have our car ready within the hour.  How often does that happen?  Apparently the trick is to ply them with gasoline. They said all of our Car Drama has been because of one lone corroded wire.  Amusingly called the "Exciter Wire". 

I am not clear on why, when first given the task of finding out why our vehicle seemed determined to drive us Insane, by intermittently-not-starting-only-to-start-fine-several-hours-later, the dealer would not check the electronics, including the wires connecting said electronics, responsible for said vehicle STARTING, but that's just me being particular.  I am grateful they didn't tell us we needed a new starter motor.  Because by yesterday I was out of fight.  My car had defeated me and I just wanted to appease it. By throwing money at it. Hell, I would have painted it pink and driven it nekkid if only it promised to START when requested.   

So I'm not sure if we can count my car in the "out" column.  At a minimum, it has caused enough grief to warrant an honorable mention. Not to mention the inconvenience and Drama for the extended family who kept having to rescue us from strange places, pick us up in the dark of night, and generally shuttle us around [A big thank you again!].  It was made worse because we held off on dealer visit #2, expecting another big bill & thus causing much interim inconvenience, only to have the solution be on the cheap side (This time.  I'm not actually expecting this to have fixed the problem.  Because that'd be too easy). 

So we'll call the score 4.5 up.  [Or down?  My metaphors are running wild.]  Any takers on the next big ticket item to die?  Anyone?  We're offering excellent odds over here!  Water heater?  Furnace?  Dishwasher?  Oh! The fun we're having! 

[PS.  The spacing issue is also driving me nuts. I hit two spaces automatically, except when I remember I Was Wrong, and only hit one.  So now I just look inconsistent.]